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My Girls Chapter 17

Taboo
2006-09-27

Chapter 17 I woke up the next morning to the delicious smells of breakfast. I had fallen asleep on the couch, and spent the night there. That did wonders for my back. I decided I'd better get up fast and find out who the burglar was that had broken into the house and was making breakfast. It surely wasn't one of my girls this early in the morning!
Imagine my surprise when I entered the kitchen and found Katie cooking breakfast. Katie? I went over to her, put my arms around her from behind, and made a big point of looking at the clock closely after kissing her neck. She sighed softly, and leaned back against me. The smile she gave me would have lit up a small town for a while.
"What are you looking at?" She asked.
"Just wondering how the clock got so messed up on time. "
She looked at it, puzzled. "It's the right time. " She insisted. Then, she reached over and gently bit my ear as she realized what I was saying. Ah, so there was a difference between Cindi and Katie. Cindi would never have gotten that joke.

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   After a little more hugging, she steered me over to the chair to sit down. She looked at me for a second, head tilted sideways slightly (I love it when they do that), then started to rub my shoulders. Sometimes there are advantages to having girls that can sense emotions. She made my back feel better. I didn't really care if it did or not, as long as she kept kissing my neck and kept those cute little hands on me. Then she slipped onto my lap and kissed me. That was good, too. She whispered in my ear how she would like to make something else feel good, too, but Amy would probably feel that emotion. Then she served and fed me breakfast.
By the time Amy stumbled in, I was eating my own breakfast; Katie was hungry and was eating her own instead of feeding me. Amy walked in, took one look at Katie, looked at me with a surprised but pleased look on her face, and then mouthed "thank you!" to me and went over to get her own breakfast. She sat down to eat, and Katie and she proceeded to have one of those teenage conversations where I wasn't even sure what language they were speaking, much less understand any of it. I could've bought a Porsche for what I spent sending them to school just so they could talk like that! Well, not really, but you get my point. After Katie left to get ready for school, Amy looked closely at me.
"Thank you, Daddy, for whatever you did last night to cheer up Katie.

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   I can't stand to see her unhappy. I don't know how you do it; you always were able to do the same thing with Cindi. " Brief jolt of sadness for both of us at the mention of Cindi.
"Well, Amy, if you got sad once in a while I could show you," I teased. Then I turned serious. "Of course, the one time you did I was a miserable failure. "
"Daddy! That's not true. You were a big reason why I came back. We just needed a little help. "
"Your Mom will be in town tomorrow," I reminded Amy. Katie walked back into the room as I said it.
"Really?" Katie asked.
"Yeah. It's their birthday. Nice hint, Dad.

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  " Amy the smart aleck. We told Katie about the whole weekend of festivities we usually had planned. She was excited. They never did anything fun like that in her family.
After dropping the girls off at school, I decided to see a lawyer friend of mine. I told him about Katie's situation, and asked him about adopting her. He said I would need a signed statement from her current "mother" releasing her. I thought that would be easy, even if I had to bribe her. He said statements from the real parents might or might not be necessary depending on the language of the judgment of the court. He would research that, and get back to me. In any case, unless someone fought it, it should be able to be done quickly, since she was already living with us. I told him to let me know if there were any problems and I would take care of it.
I checked in with Chief Haskin to see if there was any progress with the accident investigation, but he wasn't in. I told his secretary I would check back in later, and headed for work. I checked in with the Director of Microbiology about Amy's bug.

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   He told me they had made some substantial progress, but he couldn't tell me anything yet. He'd let me know when he had something. Maybe I'm just paranoid, but I had the feeling he knew more than he was saying and that he wasn't happy with what he knew.
After work, I stopped by a jewelry store to pick up Victoria's birthday present. I had put it on layaway a few weeks ago when I saw her admiring it. I'm sure I wouldn't surprise her, but she would enjoy it anyway. When I got home, Amy and Katie had supper ready again. I could get used to this.
After supper, Amy came down to talk to me. Must be serious, I thought, the 'twins' were not together.
"Dad," she started. Yep. Dad. Serious. "Can I ask you a question?" Really serious.

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   She didn't sit down or cuddle.
"No, Amy, you are not allowed to ever talk to me again. Of course you can ask me a question. "
"Well, it's just that I know you aren't going to answer it, so I don't know why I am bothering. . . Dad, do you have someone following us?"
Damn! Certifiable genius. I never expected her to notice that, though. Those guys are good.
"Why would I have anyone following you, honey?"
She rolled her eyes, gave me an 'Amy' look, and stamped her foot in frustration.
"Look, Dad, I know I'm just a kid, so I don't really expect you to tell me things that you haven't even told Mom about what you really do for a living, but don't treat me like an idiot, ok? I want to know if this is something I should be worried about, or if there is something I should know about. I guess I could just take him out next time I see him and ask him myself. You know I can do that.
Damn it. Why does she have to be so damn smart all the time? Why not just when I'm ready for it and think it is cute?
"Ok, Amy.

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   I won't treat you like the idiot you are acting like. What did he look like, and how did he act?" She described him and his actions to me. Nothing to worry about; one of mine. Except a 13 year old girl had just made one of the best shadowers I had ever met. Maybe I should hire her!
"Don't worry about it, Amy. He's one of the good guys. Just a little added protection I arranged for my family. "
"And your family would need added protection why?" Great. She wasn't going to let this go. I guess I was going to have to piss her off.
"Let me worry about that, ok sweetie? You just concentrate on being a teenager that doesn't irritate her parents too much. Ok?" That should just about do it.
She gave me another 'Amy' look.
"Strange, how someone who works in a hospital can arrange protection like that. " She stomped off.

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Well! That was fun. Wonder how long she would be mad at me about that?
I had trouble sleeping again that night, so I went down to the basement to watch TV again. Maybe the excitement about the upcoming weekend; I really did enjoy these times together. Maybe an uncomfortable feeling I had that I was not going to like the results of the investigations that were running. Maybe I was just secretly hoping Katie would come find me. Whatever the reason, I finally dozed off, only to wake up with Katie sitting on my lap kissing me.
"Hey, sleepy head. Couldn't stay awake waiting for me? If you are really tired, I can leave you alone tonight. "
I put my arms around her and held her so she could not get away.
"You are not going anywhere, Little One. Now, what was this you were going to show me this morning that Amy would have picked up on?"
She grinned, giggled, and slowly took her clothes off. Not that she had a lot on anyway. The universal uniform, panties and a tee shirt. Then she just as slowly took my clothes off. I love it when she undresses me.

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   Then she swallowed my cock all the way, and gave me one of the best blowjobs I had ever had. The things she does with her tongue, lips, hands and teeth had me filling her mouth within minutes. Then she sat down on me, taking me inside her before I could get soft, and proceeded to bring herself to an orgasm as I watched. I just love to watch her tremble and shake all over, with her head buried in my neck, kissing me and trying to keep from screaming her brains out.
We cuddled for a while, and then she started to cry. I instinctively knew this was not the usual happy cry. Something was wrong.
"What is it, pretty lady? Talk to me. "
"You are going to hate me so much. I seduced you and started this whole thing and now I have to stop it. I'm so sorry!" she sobbed.
"Sweetheart, this has always been up to you, whenever you need it. We can stop whenever you feel the need to. But why do you have to stop it?"
"I don't want to! I love you so much, and you make me feel so good I cannot believe it. You and Victoria have been so nice to me, giving me a place to stay, and even talking about adopting me.

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   And I repay Victoria for all her kindness by seducing her husband behind her back. The kids at school are right — I am just a slut. " She sobbed brokenly against my chest.
This was going to be fun. I love problems this easy to solve. I lifted her head up, looked into her eyes, and wiped her tears away, kissing her gently.
"Katie. . . look at me. You are not a slut. Sluts sleep with multiple guys at once. You are not two-timing me are you? And you said you were seducing me behind Victoria's back. Would it help it I told her about it?" I teased, trying to get her to laugh.
She smiled shyly.

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   "Well, I'm not sleeping with or making out with anyone else. I am dating someone, though. " She looked at me nervously. "Is that ok?" Then what I said dawned on her. "No! Please don't tell Victoria! She would hate me! Not to mention she'd probably kill me and kick me out of the house!" She looked frantic. She did not seem to see the humor of being killed and then kicked out of the house.
"Of course it is ok. You should be dating boys your own age. Katie, you know I love Victoria very much. You said I was a nice, sweet guy. Did you ever wonder why I gave in to you so easily? Why I did these same things with Cindi?
"Well. . . because I seduced you and you couldn't resist, because I remind you of Cindi? Because you felt sorry for both of us? Because you get lonely and. .

 

  . you know. . . when Victoria is gone so much? I don't know. "
I laughed. "You certainly are very pretty and sexy, Little One, and you would be hard to resist, but I think I could have managed it if I had wanted to. " She blushed prettily. "The truth is, Katie, Cindi did seduce me the first time, but Victoria knew about it by the second time we made love. She approved of it, because of the good effects it was having on Cindi's recovery. She also told me in so many words that I was a fool and she would kick my butt if I did not make love to you. She has given me permission to be with you anytime she is out of town. Not only given permission, but strongly encouraged it. "
"WHAT?!? Why would she do that? Why would she share someone like you with someone like me?" Katie looked stunned.
"Because she loves you.

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   She knows I love you. She knows how much I miss Cindi and how much you remind me of her. She knows how hurt you have been, sexually and emotionally, and she knows I can help with that as I did with Cindi. Because we are grateful to you for saving Amy's life. We discussed things we could do for you in appreciation. She knew you were in love with me and the thing you wanted most in life was to make love to me. Was she right?" She blushed and looked down when I said that.
"Yes," she whispered shyly. "But, I would never try to take you away or make this a permanent arrangement or anything like that! I just want to enjoy you when I can. "
"She knows that, Katie. No offence, pretty girl, but you could never take me away from Victoria. No one could. This is not meant to be permanent. You will someday fall in love with a wonderful man and you will not need this anymore. Until then, I am here anytime you need me.

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   As long as Victoria is not in town. As long as you follow certain guidelines. Do not get pregnant. Do not bring diseases home from other guys. Do not tell anyone. "
"I would never tell anyone! Those other things would all involve having sex with someone else, and I am just not interested in that. So, you really mean it is ok? She doesn't mind?"
"Yes. Now, shut up and make me happy, Little One!" I teased her.
Suddenly, I had 90 lbs of wiggly, squirmy Katie all over me, kissing, hugging, and sucking everything she could find to get her mouth on. Then she decided she wanted to do something special for me. First, she pretended she was Cindi. That was sad but nice also. Then she pretended she was Amy, giving herself to me for the first time. How hot was that?!? I do not even want to think about that anymore! By the time she left to go back to bed, I was exhausted. I was going to have to get some sleep one of these nights.

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   It was not going to be tomorrow night, though, because Victoria was coming home. I told the girls they could sleep over at Rebecca's house if they wanted, but strangely, they both said no, they would just suffer through it. Giggle, giggle.
When I got home from work that evening and walked into the kitchen, I was greeted with the prettiest sight I could ever want to see. Victoria, Amy and Katie were all working together, cooking dinner. I just stood there and watched, and listened, before they knew I was there. Victoria was the essence of loveliness; at 37, she still looked no more than 25. Amy, looking so much like her, looked older than her 13, maybe 16. For some reason, I doubt it was accidental, they were wearing almost the same outfit. Finally, Katie, looking so different, yet so much like Cindi it took my breath away. The others looked happy, but Katie positively glowed. She was happier than I had ever seen her. I knew Victoria would be talking to me tonight! They were all mine for the whole weekend. Tonight was staying at home night. Tomorrow evening was dinner at Victoria's parents' house.

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   Sunday was the birthday celebration at our house, with just us four.
As we were relaxing after dinner, teasing each other and just generally having a wonderful time, Victoria and I decided it was time to talk to them about Katie's future.
"Amy, Katie," Victoria said, "Your Dad and I have talked about it, and considering Katie's situation at home, we decided we would like to start proceedings to adopt Katie. Your Dad has looked into it and it should not be hard to do, and hopefully would not take that long. What do you girls think about that?"
Of course, Katie was excited. I had warned her not to let on that I had already mentioned it to her. Amy had a strange look on her face, one I could not read. Victoria noticed it too, and looked at me questioningly, but I did not know what was going on.
"Sure. That would be great," Amy said, then burst into tears, ran into her room, and closed the door. Victoria and I looked at each other in shock. We never would have even dreamed that Amy would have a problem with this. Katie started crying and looked devastated. I told Victoria I would talk to Amy and headed for her room. I knocked on the door.

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"Amy. It's Daddy. Can I come in, sweetie?"
I heard a very tiny "yes". Amy was lying on her bed, sobbing her heart out. I have never been able to handle females crying. It just tears me up inside. Amy crying has always been particularly upsetting to me, maybe because she does it so seldom. This was several times in the last two months. Poor little thing. I sat down next to her on the bed, took her head and lay it in my lap, and just held her, stroking her hair. Finally, she calmed down a little.
"Want to tell me about it? A very upset little girl out there does not know why you do not want her to be your sister. Honey, how did we screw up? I honestly thought you would be happy about it; we wanted to surprise you. You and Katie seem to be so close. .

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  . " I was thoroughly confused and upset that I had caused all this commotion. I could just imagine how Katie must feel.
Amy looked at me with big, sad eyes. What had I missed? I felt like I should know why she was crying. I braced myself for the chewing out I was going to get. Amy is not the most forgiving or diplomatic person when she is upset. Usually you did not have to guess what the problem was.
"God, Daddy, I am such a brat! Poor Katie, she must feel just awful. I really am happy for her, and I really think it is a great idea. I would love to have Katie as a sister. It just seems like. . . we are just forgetting about Cindi.

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   I am so happy around Katie and it just feels like I should be missing Cindi and not being happy. When I heard we were going to adopt Katie, it just seemed we would not even need or remember Cindi anymore. I'm so sorry, I'm so silly, and now I've made a scene and Mom and Katie both probably hate me; Katie's so upset; I can feel how upset she is in my mind. And you have to listen to all this nonsense from me and I'm ruining your birthday weekend. . . Daddy, is this what they call a relapse? Am I having a relapse? I don't want to go back to the way I was before. Please help me, Daddy!" she cried as she started sobbing again.
I didn't know what to do. This was such a little thing, but it was so big to her.
"Honey, we don't have to adopt Katie right now. We don't have to adopt her at all. It was just an idea to help her. However, we can take our time and let you get used to it. She can still stay here just like she has been.

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  "
"No! I really don't mind. It's so important to her. She needs to belong to a family. I'm the idiot here, not her for wanting a family. I just need to calm down here for a while, and then go back out there and see if I can repair the damage I have just done. I hope it can be repaired. Tell them I'm ok and I'll be out in a little while. "
"Amy, they love you. They will understand. Don't be so hard on yourself. I'll tell them. "
I went back out to a sobbing, red, puffy eyed, almost hysterical Katie, with Victoria futilely trying to comfort her. I walked over, picked up Katie, and sat down on the couch with her in my lap. She buried her head in my chest and sobbed. Victoria looked lost, not knowing what to do.

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   I smiled at her and told her it would be ok.
I finally got Katie to calm down. I sat her down between Victoria and me, so I could talk to them both.
"Katie, Amy thinks you hate her now. "
"I don't hate her! I love her. I thought she hated me. I can find somewhere else to live. I don't want her to think I am pushing her out of her family. I can go somewhere else. I don't want to hurt her!"
"She doesn't want you to leave. She thinks it is wonderful that you would be her sister. She was just taken by surprise. She just thought we were all forgetting about Cindi. " I cringed at the look of horror on Victoria's face. "She understands now how impossible that is.

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   She's afraid she's having a relapse and she doesn't want to go back to how she was. We have to be gentle with her; she's a very hurt little girl. Just because she's been acting normal the last two weeks we tend to think everything is ok. Even though you have helped a lot, Katie, she still misses Cindi sometimes. "
Amy finally came out of her room. She apologized to everyone, then took Katie by the hand and led her into her room, and closed the door. They came back out an hour later, laughing and joking and giggling as if nothing had ever happened. Teenagers! So resilient.
Later, when it was time to go to bed, I asked Amy if she needed to sleep with us tonight. She rolled her eyes and giggled.
"I don't think so! I would like to get some sleep! Besides, you might not be able to tell Mommy and me apart in the dark! Hmmm, on second thought. . . " Victoria swatted her on the butt for that. Both Katie and Amy hugged Victoria goodnight together, each whispering in an ear.

 

   Victoria blushed?!? I have to hear what they said!
Neither one of us bothered to wear any clothes to bed. We were both too excited for such unnecessary frills. Victoria was in a playful mood, however, as she proceeded to give me one of the best blowjobs in history. She kept bringing me right to the point of climaxing, then backing off and letting me calm down. I had a flashback of the first time Cindi had done that to me. Now I realized where she had gotten the idea. The little imp had been watching us! I looked over at the doorway and sure enough, two little wide-eyed faces were showing through the partially open door! They looked guilty and started to dive under cover until they heard me laugh. I smiled and mouthed "I love you!" to them as they watched. They mouthed it back as Victoria stopped long enough to ask me why I laughed. I told her it was because I loved her and she made me so happy. That was true. When she lowered herself down on me, taking me inside her, I understood why she had taken me so far with the blowjob. She was so wet! She exploded with her first orgasm as soon as I was inside her. Just in the short time it took me to peak, she had another orgasm. This was going to be a fun night! The two little faces looked stunned.

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Later, as we were resting together, she looked at me and grinned. I knew that grin; I was in trouble.
"So," she whispered sexily, "how was Katie?" I looked to make sure our little voyeurs were no longer present.
"I thought she was fine tonight," I answered, deliberately misunderstanding her. "Once I explained why Amy. . . OW! What was that for?" I exclaimed, feigning hurt feelings after she punched me. I did not have to pretend it hurt physically.
"You know what I am talking about, smart aleck. How WAS she?"
"How do you know I did anything yet? I just said I would think about it. "
"Are you kidding me? She was positively glowing tonight. Either you did, or she has been taken over by aliens. " This was a fun game, but I decided I did not want to risk another punch, so I told her what she wanted to know.
"She was sweet, wonderful, very talented, not as good as you, but very enjoyable.

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   She has also been very badly hurt, as you suspected. " I told her the story Katie had told me. Katie had given me permission to tell Victoria. She had tears in her eyes, just as I did, when I first heard it. "Patrick John Phillips, you better tell me you made love to that poor girl after that story, or I'm going to beat you!"
"No, but I let her seduce me. Afterwards, she had a panic attack, thinking she was betraying you. I had to tell her that you knew. " I heard Victoria laugh at that. I answered her unspoken question. "Yeah, she was freaked out, but once I convinced her it was true, she was happy. " I told her all about that night. She insisted on the details.
"You make sure you keep that girl happy when I'm gone. She is way too precious to lose. " Victoria ordered.

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   Yes, ma'am!
"Since I told you about her, does that mean I can tell them all about our sex life?' I teased.
"What? You mean the stuff they didn't see tonight peeking through the door?" She giggled.
"You knew about that?" I asked, shocked.
"Hell, Cindi and Amy have been doing that for years. I figured with me gone so much, it was better than relying on you to give them the sex education talk!" This time I swatted her.
"Well, I did give them the talk. " I told her about the experience with all the girls and the strip poker and sex talk. She was laughing hysterically by the time I was done.
"Damn! I'm going to have to watch it or I'm going to be sharing you with all those girls!" She didn't sound too distressed at the idea.
"Right. Just what they want. An old man and their friend's father to boot. They're not all like Katie, you know. "
"Are you kidding? All of those girls would take you in a minute. Maybe at the same time, for all I know.

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   Even the ones like Elizabeth and Emily who haven't the foggiest idea what sex is are hot for you, willing to learn. " Great. I did not need to hear that! There is one good way to shut Victoria up. Well, from speaking, that is. She didn't say any coherent words for quite a while after that.
The next morning, we all had breakfast together. Amy and Katie looked tired, but then it was before noon. I asked them if they slept well last night.
"No," Amy complained. "Someone was torturing small animals all night long. " Katie leaned over and whispered in her ear. "Oh! That was Mom and Dad? Who would have known? However, I think they deserve some recognition for their stamina, if nothing else. " Smart-ass comedians. They both stood up and clapped long and loud. Both Victoria and I were blushing furiously.

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   They finally got us good. Katie leaned over and whispered in a loud stage voice.
"I have some experience in these matters. They are really not very good. Your Dad climaxes way too soon and obviously does not care a wit about his partner's enjoyment. And your Mom shows an amazing lack of flexibility, inventiveness and interest. She just lays there like a bump on a log. " She giggled and ducked as I threw a biscuit at her. Amy reached out nonchalantly and caught it without even looking. She caught me looking at her in surprise and she just smiled and shrugged her shoulders. Then Katie cringed in mock fear as I gave her a 'see if you get any more of my not very good technique' look. All of us were red now at Katie's crude remarks. I wondered how many other sides this girl has to her that we had not even seen yet.
The girls, including Victoria, decided they wanted to go shopping, so I decided to go with them for a change. I usually get bored very fast with shopping.

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   They figured out that if they tried on sexy bathing suits occasionally, that would keep me attentive. Boy, did it! Then they had to try on panties and bras and they had to have my opinion on those. I told them I could not really tell unless I could see them as they were taken off, or took them off myself. Katie said "ok" and giggled, Amy turned red and got tongue tied, Victoria whispered "later". We had a fun time all day. They even let me look at some electronic stores. They rolled their eyes, but they smiled patiently while I played. Mainly because Victoria looked with me, since she is an electronics geek also. It also gave us a chance to neck and embarrass the girls.
We got home mid afternoon. The girls decided what they were going to wear to the dinner that night. Then we all decided to take a nap, since we would probably be up late. Of course, we all piled into the same bed to nap. I didn't actually sleep; I just watched three very beautiful females as they slept. I love to watch them sleep.

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   When I got bored with that, I would tickle Amy or Katie's ear and watch them swat at it in their sleep. I tickled Victoria in another, more fun place. After the third time, I found out she wasn't as asleep as I thought; she whispered that if I kept that up, she was going to have to kick the girls out of the room. I suggested we go into Amy's room. One of these days when I really want to gross Amy out, I will have to tell her we made love in her bed!
Dinner that night was interesting. Victoria's parents are nice people. They adopted her when she was 16 years old. She had been living in foster homes from the time she was two years old until they adopted her. She was just elated when she finally found a permanent family. I understood exactly what she went through, as I had gone through a similar situation. She does not talk about it much, but I think she had a much tougher time of it than I did. As Amy said once, something happened that made her so frantic to protect her babies at all costs. I suspect there are things about her early teen years that we did not know and that she would love to forget.
I usually can't resist, when we get together with her parents, to take the opportunity to find out things about her past. This time I was checking up on something she told me after the incident at the fair.

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   I was talking to her Father in the study, alone.
"By the way, I wanted to thank you for the self-defense courses that you let Victoria take when she was young. They have really helped out with teaching the girls some things they need to know. " By now, I pretty much figured the response I was going to get.
"Well, I wish we could take credit for that, but we never had her in any such classes that I know of. Maybe it was before we adopted her. She always was pretty graceful, though. " He proceeded to tell me several stories from her mid teens. I love to hear those stories. He got a brilliant idea just as the others came into the room.
"Would you like to see all her pictures in the family album? We found it the other day when we cleaning up. " He pulled it out of a drawer.
"Dad. . .

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   Patrick and the girls don't want to see all that old stuff. " Victoria protested.
"Yes we do!" we all yelled in unison. Wow! It had been a long time since I had received a dirty look like that from Victoria. I try to avoid getting that look. I am scared of her, but Amy's not. She laughed at her. We spent quite some time looking at the pictures. It was remarkable how much she and Amy looked alike when Victoria was 13. You could literally mistake one for the other. Then he pulled out the real special picture.
"This is one we just found the other day. I hope this does not upset you, Victoria. This is the only picture we have of her from her original family. It shows her Mom, Dad, and brother with her when she was about two years old.

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   Isn't she cute?" Unfortunately, there was no response, because it was at exactly that moment that Katie and I both had an attack of the clumsies and we both dropped our glasses on the floor, shattering them in a hundred pieces. After much apologies and helping to clean up the mess, the album was forgotten, to Victoria's relief.
Katie and I managed not to make any more messes the rest of the night. I noticed Amy giving us some curious looks periodically. I knew she was reading my emotions and I was upset about something. I was trying not to show it until I could check out something at home. Something was bothering Katie too; I did not need emotional reading ability to see that she could not sit still. I knew that nosey little Amy was not going to let the evening pass without bugging me about it. Sure enough, a few minutes later I felt her sidle up close to me.
"So. . . mister sure fingers, I don't think I have ever seen you drop a wine glass before. Waste of good wine. You seem somewhat upset.

 

   Want to talk about it?" She smiled at me so sweetly. Amy really is a sweetheart — she loves to help people. We have always been open with each other and pleasant to each other when we overstep the boundaries of privacy. I am sure knowing that made my answer even more confusing to her.
"No, Amy, I don't want to talk about it. If I wanted to talk about it with you, I would have come to you. Why don't you go bother your mother for a while?" I snapped at her, turned around and walked away. I don't know why I snapped at her like that. Something was bothering me, some feeling of doom or distress, and I was distracted. I would never have talked to Amy that way otherwise. When I looked at her later, she did not look like her feelings were hurt; she was just looking at me with a sad and worried look on her face. I need not have worried about hurting her feelings; Amy had a cause now. Daddy was upset about something, so she made it a point to stay as close to me as she could, touching me and holding my arm any chance she got. I wasn't so distracted that I didn't appreciate it. Just do not bug me about my emotions when I did not have them sorted out myself.

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   I was trying desperately to figure out what it was that was bothering me. Something about Victoria's childhood just was not right. I could not put my finger on what it was that I saw or heard that was out of place, but whatever it was, it had triggered either some unpleasant memories or deep-seated concerns. Whatever it was, it was worrying me and I was scared since somehow I knew it involved Victoria.
The rest of the evening was pleasant enough, although I must admit I didn't remember much of it. Amy stuck to me all night like glue. It wasn't unpleasant, as she really is a very pleasant and very pretty young lady, and she did not bug me anymore about talking to her. Katie still seemed antsy about something, but it did not seem critical. Otherwise, everyone had a good time. The ride home was quiet. I really didn't feel like talking, and Victoria noticed that. Amy and Katie dozed in the backseat. As we prepared for bed, Amy gave me a big, close, special hug and kiss, and then looked at me with those marvelous eyes of hers, full of concern and worry. She laid her cheek against mine, her mouth to my ear.
"I love you, Daddy, so very much.

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   No matter what, I love you. Remember that. No matter what," she whispered. Then she went to bed. Katie gave me a somewhat distracted hug, and headed for bed also. When Victoria and I went to bed, she just quietly held me close, letting me feel the love she had for me. She could sense something was wrong. She could also sense I couldn't talk about it yet. For the first time since as far back as I could remember, we didn't make love. Somehow she knew I couldn't. She knew I just needed her close. We held each other close all night long. Sometime during the night, Amy came in, and when I awoke the next morning, she was cuddled close to the other side of me. That was about the only joy I was to experience that day.
I was even worse after we got up Sunday.

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   After I got out of bed with Victoria and Amy, I wandered around the house like a lost puppy. I just couldn't snap myself out of it. I yelled at Amy again. She just smiled sweetly at me and told me she loved me. Later that afternoon I yelled at Katie when she wanted to talk to me and she ran out of the room in tears. A few minutes later, Victoria came into the room. She took me by the hand and led me into our bedroom, and closed the door. She looked unhappy.
"Ok, you have yelled at Amy twice now. Katie is in tears, because her Daddy doesn't love her anymore. It is my turn now. Yell at me, get it over with, and then maybe you can tell me what this is all about. " She looked really worried.
"I don't know what is wrong. If I knew, I would tell you.

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   I just have this dreadful feeling that something is terribly wrong, that disaster is about to strike me. I wish I knew. I can't believe I yelled at Katie. And Amy. Please tell them I love them. I'm too ashamed to face them. "
"I have an idea," Victoria said brightly, trying to cheer me up. "Let's exchange presents now instead of this evening. " She called out to the girls, then took me by the hand and led me out to the living room.
I insisted that we give Victoria her presents first. I did not feel that I deserved any, the way I was acting. Suddenly, I understood how Amy was feeling after Cindi died. How she was acting out, knew she was doing it, felt awful about it, but just couldn't help herself.
I gave Victoria a bracelet she had wanted and that I loved too. It was a pearl string, with delicate gold chains on either side.

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   It was beautiful. She was ecstatic. The girls got her things she was just as excited about. I don't even remember what they were. I was happier, laughing and having a good time. The darkness had receded for a while at least. Victoria gave me a new watch. Amy got me sweet little things that I would treasure later, but didn't remember what it was at the time. Even Katie got me something. Then, Amy said she had one more special present. As she went to get it, the phone rang. She answered it, and then came back to me.
"It's for you, Daddy. "
"Tell them to call back later," Victoria snapped. It seemed my lousy mood of before was rubbing off.

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"He said it was important. He needs to talk to Dad immediately. " Amy sounded concerned.
I took the call in the office. I knew who it was before I even answered the phone.
"Patrick, it is John Haskin. Happy birthday to you and Victoria. "
"Thank you, John. We appreciate the good wishes. But that is not why you called, is it?"
He sighed. "I'm afraid not. Patrick, I looked over all the information on Cindi's accident. I'm afraid we missed something very important in the original investigation. The truck driver was dead before the collision. He had a bullet wound in the head.

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   Someone else steered that truck and set the fire before escaping out the passenger door. I'm afraid it was no accident. "
"You're telling me Cindi was murdered?" I whispered. "How did you miss this on the original investigation?" Oh God, Cindi, forgive me for not protecting you!
"I'm afraid so. I don't know how it was missed. Parts of the autopsy report were inexplicitly left out of the police report. We're investigating that. " What he didn't say was more important than what he said. "I'm also afraid I have some more bad news for you. "
"What could you tell me worse than this?" I asked, my voice breaking. What could be worse than killing my little girl? I found out; trying to kill my other little girl.
"The Director of the Microbiology Laboratory at the hospital just called me. He hasn't been able to reach you. He has asked me to initiate an attempted murder investigation for Amy's illness. It seems the virus she was infected with was an engineered virus, the kind developed by Biological Warfare Laboratories.

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   He says there is no way she could have been infected accidentally, especially since she was the only one infected. She was very lucky; that virus has a near 100% fatality rate, with the few survivors succumbing to a relapse within a week. "
Suddenly I was calmer. I thought I knew what I had been dreading.
"We will be investigating both of these crimes. I assure you we will find those responsible and bring them to justice.
"Pull your people out, John. I will take care of this one," I whispered.
"Patrick. . . we have discussed this before. I have seen how you work in this type of situation before. I will not have the streets of my city filled with dead bodies. You and Victoria are dear friends, but I cannot let you do this.

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  "
"You can't stop it, John. It's going to happen whether I want it to or not. Get your people clear. I don't want any of them on my conscience. " I hung up the phone.
I sat there, berating myself. I had failed Cindi. She had died because I didn't protect her. I had suspected what Victoria really did after San Francisco. I had known for sure after I had met Robert, after the incident at the Fair. I had stopped digging after that meeting because I had recognized Robert. He didn't know me, but I knew of him. Still, I had trusted them to protect my girls, instead of doing it myself. They had failed; I had failed. But for Cindi's strange powers, Amy would be dead too.

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   Cindi saved Amy, I killed Cindi. How could I tell Victoria that her baby had been murdered? What would happen if — when — she found out that I had the ability to protect her babies and had failed not once, but twice? How could she continue to love me, live with me after that? How could Amy stand to look at me, her Dad, who had let her twin be killed, had put her through all her suffering? These thoughts continued to swirl and build in my head as I outwardly calmed myself to go out to face my family, for probably the last birthday I would ever spend with them.
I actually appeared calm and happy when I rejoined the family. I told Victoria the call was nothing important. Amy and Katie were not fooled. They could read my emotions, could see the intense turmoil in my mind. They had an almost scared look on their faces. Amy said she had one more special present for me. She handed me a four-inch cube box.
"This was Cindi's present for you, Daddy," she said almost fearfully. I opened it slowly. Inside was a crystal sphere. Inside the sphere were tendrils of bright green and bright blue, the colors of Amy and Cindi's eyes. Etched in the glass was an inscription. It said, "Love me.

 

   Trust me. " Suddenly, images flooded my mind, showing me what had happened in that hospital room. I remembered it all. Suddenly, I couldn't take anymore. I got up from the chair and walked out to the patio, to gaze out over the landscape. Amy, Katie and Victoria watched me go with surprised looks on their faces. I heard Amy whisper.
"Mommy! He is not ok!" She said fearfully.
Just when I thought things could not possibly get worse, I suddenly realized what was not right with Victoria's childhood. I remembered a picture in an envelope in my bottom desk drawer, underneath all the papers. A picture I had only looked at once and nobody else had ever seen. I walked back into my office, and took out the envelope, removing the picture. The only picture I had of my original family. A picture of a Mom, Dad, and a little girl and a little boy. I turned it over and saw an inscription on the back, an inscription I had never seen before, with a date on it.

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   It said:
"Mom, Dad and the two year old twins. . . Patrick and Victoria. " It was exactly the same picture I had seen at Victoria's parents' house last night. With shaking hands, I put the picture back where I found it.
I felt the darkness closing in. I knew this meant I had lost Victoria forever. How could she stay married to me once she saw this picture? I could not hide it from her. How could any of them want to be around the one who had failed to protect Cindi, had failed to protect Amy? I didn't even want to live anymore. I felt my body, my mind closing down as my mind reeled under the multiple shocks it had received. As I felt myself sinking to the floor, tears running down my face, I dimly heard Amy and Katie scream as I saw Victoria walk through the doorway.
"Mommy! Daddy needs you! He is not ok!"
At the same time, I heard Victoria yell "Amy! Get in here and help me with your Dad! Now!" That was the last thing I remembered before I blacked out.
.
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