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Ron on Condoms

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2010-03-08

Ron was sneaking in hermoines cupboard when he saw a box full of small rubber cylindrical tube. The box read Condoms
Ron to himself “what this thing is?” He stare that box for a minute and decided to ask hermoine about this muggle thing. She was in other room chit chatting with her parents. He decided to call her
Ron: HERMOINE, What is this thing in your cupboard? It reads CONDOMS. Did you hear me?”
Hermoine: shhhhhh R-
Mr. Granger storm in the room with her wife
He asked angrily “What you both Up to?”
Hermoine: Da- Dad I don’t –
Ron little nervous now, not able to understand sudden change in environment.
Ron: Mr grang- granger it’s just nothing. I think hermoine wants to gift me this condom thing. She wanted to surprise me with this gift. She had hid it very well. Isn’t it very cool Mr granger?

Mr. Granger at his full voice” From where you stole this. . this. . thing? You are just 16.

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Hermoine was nearly in tears.

Ron: Mr Granger, I don’t think she stole it. I, I think if I remember correctly my father gave her …yes yes Mr Granger, my father gave her as a parting gift and told her to use well. How silly of me Mr Granger. Sorry for the confusion
Ron doesn’t know whether it happened before his completing his sentence or after that but for some good reason hermoine started to cry. Both her parents were speechless. Ron’s best guess was that this condom thing is very expensive and Mr. Granger thinks that hermoine has stolen it. Finally, Mr Granger almost stammering spoke” I don’t believe this. ”
At that exact moment a shadow appeared and all 8 eyes saw a figure appearing. Ron breathed and in pleading voice spoke” Dad, thank god you came. Dad can you please confirm that, you have given this condom thing to hermoine as parting gift?

Mr Weasley saw all 8 eyes, trying to grasp the situation. Ron’s eyes were pleading, Hermoine’s eyes were nearly swollen, Mrs. Granger eyes were watery and Mr. Granger eyes could have made You-know-who nervous.

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   “What the hell I know what condom is? “He thought.

    Mr. Weasley: Oh right Mr. Granger, I gave hermoine this gift. I thought it would be very useful, mostly in school. Oh, I see box is already open. Did you use it, Hermoine? Do you like it? Well-
    But he was broke in middle by Mr. Granger, who was addressing hermoine directly “Lets move girl. I think our child already needs family planning guidelines” And they move to a room closet to hermoines right.


    Ron: So dad you have any idea what this condom thing is?
    Mr weasley: No. but it seems very destructive weapon.
    Ron: Dad, Do you think You-Know-Who is using it as weapon?
    Mr. Weasley: Who knows? Apparently he might be using it now.
    Ron: Ya right. Dad do you think Dumbledore will know about this?
    Mr.

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       Weasley: That old man knows everything. He likes using muggle things.
    Ron: Dad, Can I give this thing to ginny? Plz
    Mr. Weasley: Oh no. I am planning to give condoms to her as birthday gift
    Ron: Ok dad
    .
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